Interview with Nick and Sandra Forain, the guides of the Mission Curius expedition.

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Interview with PhD Matthew Wallis

with Nick and Sandra Forain, owners of the travel agency White Hole (www.whitehole.club)

Matthew Wallis (M). How did it happen that you, of all people, became the visitors’ guides?

Sandra Forain (S). I think it’s quite simple. Shortly before the Arrival, we posted an announcement online saying that we were opening a bureau of cosmic tourism. Not in the sense of rich Earthlings flying to Mars — but rather as an opportunity for intelligent visitors to see humans and Earth as if for the first time. And, apparently, when they landed, they searched for something like that online — and, well, our announcement was the only one there.

Nick Forain (N). Turns out we were the first on the market, can you imagine? And literally soon after that, the door opened — and in walked a white retriever.

M. Quite an unusual idea, opening a bureau like that. How did it come to you?

N. Just from observing how things unfold down here. It seemed to us that without an outside view of ourselves, we’d never get out of this loop. And such a view can only come from an external observer. So, it felt like the right time for extraterrestrial visitors to arrive.

S. Besides, there’s such a degree of absurdity going on here that preparing an entertainment program for them would hardly be a problem.

M. But I suppose demand wasn’t exactly overwhelming...

S. Honestly, we’re not great at marketing. We decided to give it a try, posted the ad — and the client came. Got lucky, I guess.

N. Why? Something is wrong?

M. Remarkable, actually. But let’s get back to them. How soon did you realize they were from another world?

S. Immediately. It wasn’t difficult. First, he had green eyes — rare around here. And second, he said “Good morning,” even though it was evening.

M. “Good morning”? That surprised you? But not the fact that he spoke at all?

N. Hmm… Well, now that you mention it, yes — it is strange, a dog talking… But at the time, somehow, we didn’t think about it.

M. How do you explain that?

S. Well… he behaved so naturally. Calm, attentive visitor…

N. He was, how to put it… so organic that external details didn’t matter at all.

M. All right, let’s move on. Did you immediately discuss the travel itinerary?

N. The route? Oh yes, of course. He knew exactly where he wanted to go — the 30th Parallel North. And he needed experienced guides. And that’s when we told him what a wonderful coincidence that was — just a few years earlier we had traveled that exact route ourselves and knew it quite well.

S. They say we were practically the first to complete it straight through, in a perfect line.

M. And that coincidence didn’t strike you as strange?

N. More like joyful.

S. It felt like everything finally clicked. You know, they say that in important moments, the present is determined by the future, not the other way around. Until then, we ourselves could hardly answer why we’d gone on that journey — it was like in fairy tales: “Go there, I don’t know where; find that, I don’t know what.”

N. And then, for the first time, we realized: that’s why we went — to later become guides for our guests.

M. And did you agree right away on how everything would be organized?

S. Oh no. We nearly drove each other crazy with the simplest details — visas, passports, border crossings, permits for restricted zones — he simply couldn’t understand what any of that meant or why it was needed.

N. You see, for them, borders are lines that connect, not divide, and identity and intention are confirmed just by looking into each other’s eyes. And by scent, of course... So explaining why a border guard carries a weapon, or what a “document” is, was absolutely impossible.

M. So they don’t have border guards there?

S. Funny enough, we asked that too! Turns out they do have them — but their job is to make sure the connections don’t break. If a border is like a seam holding two pieces of fabric together, someone has to make sure it doesn’t tear.

N. Although, as we understood, those seams have become quite rare there — more like museum curiosities now. Somehow, they’ve learned to live without them.

M. I see… And how did you find common ground?

N. Well, at some point he realized there was no point in arguing and simply said it was all nonsense — if you possess the basic skills of stitching and tunneling.

S. And that it was better to just set off — we’d sort out what we call “limits” and “dead ends” along the way.

M. And what did you do?

N. What could we do? We’re just a travel agency — and the customer is always right.

M. I see… And was he right?

S. Oh yes! At least in regard to tunneling.

M. Meaning?

S. Well… imagine there’s an energy sphere on this side of the wall — and then suddenly, poof! — you observe it on the other side. I mean, it observes itself there — you’re not really involved…

N. Of course, that only happens under certain conditions — the ones that make the probability of transition equal to one.

M. You’re pulling my leg.

S. Not at all!

N. Well… maybe just a little.

(Note on tunneling: Quantum tunnelling)